I’m struggling to ward off another episode of depression, but it’s so difficult sometimes. The thing that’s really getting me down right now is the chronic pain I’m dealing with. Yes, my back/neck/arm/hand pain is flaring up again, despite my religious exercising and stretching. I don’t know what’s causing this (neither do my doctor and physical therapist). It could be aggravated by me carrying around a very heavy baby (she’s taking her first steps!), or it could be from poor posture, too much computer use and/or knitting. Whatever the source of the problem is, I’m starting to feel like it’s never going to go away completely and that I’m going to have to give up my hobbies. The thought just leaves me feeling empty and sad.

Then there’s the damn Rebecca wrap cardigan. I just pinned the pieces together (sans sleeves) to try her on and was shocked to see how small she was. My heart sank…I hardly have the will to carry on and knit the dinky sleeves. I’m hoping that blocking will help it grow to a more flattering size. If not, I think I’ll give it as a gift to one of my very slender sisters-in-law. I’m also trying to forget the fact that some of the eyelets don’t line up above one another veritically. Somehow, I drifted over a stitch in a couple of places. I can’t really see it, but I KNOW it’s there, darnit.  Normally, I’d just rip out and start over, but that’s just not going to happen with this one…who wants to frog mohair? Not me!

I also sent an email to my Secret Pal to confirm that I had the correct contact information for her and forgot to remove my name from my profile. I’m totally embarrassed. I’ll try to spoil her to death to make up for it, but it’s really too bad I blew the cover on my identity.

Finally, my job is just so damned boring. It’s a real struggle for me to drag myself downtown every day to sit in a stuffy office for eight hours and shuffle through reams of paper and to take orders from people who hardly know I exist except when something goes wrong. (Crap! I just received an email notifying me that I have a performance reivew coming up in July…)

I know these problems don’t really amount to much in the grand scheme of things (think for a minute about the horrible mess in Iraq and Afghanistan…), but it’s hard not to dwell on them…especially my back pain.  So, in an effort to cheer myself up, I’m going to list some GOOD THINGS:

1. Claire is starting to walk. Last night, she was able to go about six or seven steps before collapsing in a giggling heap.

2. Sam is having a great time learning to swim.

3. I finished a sweater which I really like.

4. We’re going to Disneyland at the end of July.

5. Umm…oh, come on, I should be able to come up with a 5th one for symmetry’s sake…uh…*mind goes blank* Oh yea! I received a bunch of new yarn for my summer knitting projects! I’ll post about that tomorrow.

A significant portion of my day is spent on the bus. Being the type of person I am, I can’t spend two hours doing nothing but watching the scenery passing by (I’m not judging anyone who does this…I wish I could achieve such zen-like serenity), so I take advantage of the time when I don’t have two kids clamoring for attention to get some reading or knitting done.

Apparently, my industriousness hasn’t gone unnoticed. On my way home yesterday afternoon, a lady peered over my seat at what I was doing. Her scrutiny made me a little bit uncomfortable and I tried to ignore her. My intense concentration on the complicated patch of stockinette stitch I was working on (snicker) didn’t deter her one bit. At long last she spoke up, telling me that my knitting had inspired her to take out a sweater she was working on 15 years ago, but had never finished. She was using some lovely alpaca she got from Peru. I nodded appreciatively.

This kind of conversation is typical of what occurs when I venture out in public with my knitting in hand.  What she told me next, however, made a bigger impact on me. She said she had been smoking for 40-something years, and due to some health problems, needed to quit immediately. Whenever she’d start to feel jittery and uncomfortable from not smoking, she’d pick up her knitting and work on that for awhile. This strategy has helpd her avoid cigarettes for the past 21 days and she’s feeling confident that she can keep it up. Now, isn’t that impressive? I was glad to contribute to her success, if only indirectly.

Drumroll, please…

At long last, I’ve finished my Berry Jacket!  Let me just say, I’m really pleased with how it turned out. The pattern is from Rebecca 27 and is titled “Jacke in Apricot.” I nicknamed mine the Berry Jacket, since I used a rich magenta color of Rowan All Season’s Cotton. 

Since I couldn’t quite achieve the recommended gauge with this yarn, I knit the larger size.  I have had some moments of insecurity about the way it fits, since I usually wear much roomier tops. I can’t get an honest opinion out of my husband about such things since he’d prefer it if I dressed like Seven of Nine.  However, after looking at several photos of other completed Apricot Jackets (Fluffa’s, Diana’s, Sharlyn’s (she used the same color!) & Froggy’s), I’ve come to the conclusion that it fits the way it’s supposed to.

Here are close-ups of the front and back (this could also serve as a cautionary illustration of what happens to the old bod after having two kids–Warning!!! WIDE hips ahead…):

Click on the thumbnails to view larger images.

If you’re interested in knitting this sweater, I highly recommend reading what others have to say about it and looking at as many photos of it as you can. The directions are difficult to decipher at first. Sometimes, the only clue I had to go on about how something should be done was a photograph.

A few finishing details: I used mattress stitch for seaming most of the sweater, but I found that back stitch provided a much cleaner line around the shoulders.  You can see a close-up of the pretty buttons I used here. The pattern called for nine, but I ended up using only eight.  I think they’re the perfect touch on a very pretty sweater!